Today was busy for me. I was up at 6AM to get ready for work, had the coldest shower of my life (came out shivering), worked until midday then went to my sisters.
To be honest, I’ve been getting so depressed sitting in the house all day. I mean, my work day ends at 12 and I can’t just go out somewhere with friends after work because they’re all either A) at work B) in university so all I really get to do is go home. Sometimes, I would get halfway home and think “Do I really want to go home?” but since there’s nowhere else to go that’s where I end up. I’m so used to working extra hours because I had been working so much during the Christmas period so sitting about depresses me. I begin to think “I don’t want to do anything”. I end up with no motivation to tidy, do dishes etc. If I’m off work I don’t even have motivation to get up. I would rather stay in my dream world (as long as I’m not dreaming of mummies chasing me through a dark passage which I have dreamt about lately btw) I just sit watching anime/reading manga. I’ve also come to the realisation that you need to watch anime and read manga in moderation. Too much will cause you to feel like your life is boring in comparison to whatever it is you have read/watched. I actually grew bored with it all so I stopped watching it for a few days.
Anyway, spending time with my sister and her amazing children is something that I needed. I’m so glad I went today. Just being around someone else and out of the house cheered me up. I spent time playing and chatting and we even did a 2 mile walk with the double pram. It didn’t feel like 2 miles because we were together and chatting. Doing it by yourself would be lonely. Spending all day at home with the kids would be lonely for her too so getting out of the house and having company was a nice treat for both of us.
Callum’s getting so big. He’s already about 9 months. He won’t crawl and hates sitting and lying down. All he wants is to stand. As long as you’re holding him while he stands he’s happy. You actually cannot put him down. He will cry. Give him a snack and he’ll sit in his high chair happily though. He actually shared his snack with me. A pretend bite wouldn’t satisfy him so I got to have a bite of a snack-a-jack. He smiles lots too and giggles/squirms when you change him because he’s so ticklish. My sister told me stories of how he tortures Anton. Callum will definitely make sure he gets his way when he gets older.
Anton’s funny. He just comes out with funny things you wouldn’t think he would even consider. My sister told me that he fed Callum a yogurt one day for her and then told her that he’s feeding him for her and that “if you don’t feed him Callum will just die”. I had to laugh when I heard that. How would he even think of something like that. We kept him awake for a while and (after bribing him with a sweet) he sat on my knee to watch In the Night Garden. Anton ended up going to bed at 7. I say went to bed but he was up playing in his room saying he can’t sleep for the next couple of hours. My sister and I were watching T.V and every now and then he called for me. I went up and he was standing wide-eyed and stretching over his safety gate saying he wants more water so I got him some. I arrived back at his room to find him standing on top of an activity table thing at the gate grinning at me. It scared the life out of me. Imagine seeing a dark room and then a child standing on top of something grinning at you. We were watching a show about a girl with schizophrenia and the girl had a look on her face when she was hallucinating that made me think of Paranormal Activity. Thinking of that movie and then seeing Anton standing there like that is NOT a good combination.
About 10 minutes later he called me saying he wants me to clean Winnie the Pooh for him ( I pretended to wipe him and gave him back which satisfied Anton). Not too long after this, something flew down the stairs and hit the wall. All we heard was “Natalie, it’s for you!” We laughed and I went to check what he had managed to throw. Y’know one of those glade air fresheners that you plug into the wall? One of those. He must have climbed and stretched to throw it over the half wall thing at the side of the stairs. He’s a wee monster. Funny though.
I was pretty tired (I’m actually suprised I’m still awake now that it’s 11.20PM) and usually I would make sure to be home in time for dinner at 6 but I didn’t feel like going home so I stayed until 9PM-ish. It takes 30-45 minutes to walk home so I got home after 10PM. I wondered where Chris was because there lights were off in our living room but he wasn’t in the bedroom. Only when I turned the light on in the living room did I find him…under the cushions on our sofa sleeping. I woke him to try to get him to go to bed instead. Turns out he had been sleeping since after dinner so after trying (and failing) to go to sleep in bed, he’s sitting playing computer games. Not really much of a suprise though. Most of the time he’s playing games (LoL, WoW, Dota etc) or asleep. Looks like he’s gonna be up all night. Oh well, more bed for me!
I’m seeing my friend on Friday and I also saw another friend had replied to my fb message (my phones broken so fb is my only way of communicating right now) from last night to say she’s free tomorrow. Hoping it wasn’t too late for her to see it, I asked if she wants to do something tomorrow. Let’s hope she got the message and that she replies before I fall asleep. I haven’t seen her in ages so it would be nice to see her. I’m off the rest of the week but at least I have things to do so I won’t have an opportunity to get that depressed/lonely/bored feeling. From now on, I think I’ll take walks or go to my sisters to even take a walk with her just to get out of the house and have company. I can’t go spending any more money since I have so many things to pay for coming up which I have no idea how I’m going to afford yet (valentines day, my passport, my holiday, an ear-piercing course, possibly car insurance) . As long as I save my money it will all work out, right?
I don’t think I can stay awake any longer. I have to sleep.